Caring for your Mental Health
Transgender individuals have to go through a lot.
Transgender individuals must advocate and navigate processes to secure basic rights that cisgender people are born with. Achieving legal recognition of our true names requires enduring lengthy court proceedings and individually contacting each entity for documentation updates. Alleviating gender dysphoria and bolstering self-esteem often entails hormone therapy and expensive surgeries. Even after undergoing these procedures, some still contend with challenges such as the inability to reproduce naturally, reminders of the privileges denied due to our birth circumstances. Like other marginalized groups, finding happiness amidst these struggles can be daunting and requires more effort than it does for cisgender individuals. However, it is possible to find fulfillment and improve well-being. The following steps, based on my own experiences and directed primarily toward FTM individuals, offer guidance that may benefit anyone navigating similar challenges.
Body Recomposition
In the realm of fitness, body recomposition involves reshaping your physique by reducing fat and maintaining or building muscle tissue. While most of us may not aspire to be professional bodybuilders, embarking on a personal body recomposition journey can significantly benefit our physical and mental well-being. It's well-known that weight loss and adopting a healthy lifestyle correlate with increased happiness and motivation levels. Therefore, cultivating healthier habits and achieving your own body recomposition can be an effective strategy for enhancing mental health.
Men and women tend to store fat differently; individuals assigned female at birth typically accumulate more fat in areas like the face, waist, and thighs, contributing to a more feminine appearance. Without hormone therapy, the pattern of fat storage remains unchanged. However, through efforts to become leaner and stronger, you can mitigate the appearance of femininity.
I initially prioritized weight loss through increased exercise and reduced food intake. Intermittent fasting, particularly the 16:8 method, proved effective for me. This involved fasting from 8 PM to 12 PM for 16 hours, followed by an eight-hour eating window from 12 PM to 8 PM. I focused on consuming healthy, whole foods while avoiding processed snacks like candies and cookies. Exercise was also crucial; cardio activities such as running or sprinting helped burn calories, aiding in weight loss by creating a caloric deficit. Additionally, I incorporated weightlifting to strengthen muscles. Due to the lower natural testosterone levels in female-bodied individuals, developing significant muscle mass without hormone therapy can be challenging. For those concerned about becoming too bulky, I recommend focusing on heavy lifting either at a gym or with a barbell set. Many online workout programs suggest aiming for 8-12 repetitions per set, but I found better results personally with a lower rep range of 4-8 using heavier weights. For those unable to lift heavy weights, performing sets of bodyweight exercises like push-ups, pull-ups, and lunges, progressing to more advanced variations, can also aid in weight loss and muscle development.
While your choices are constrained without the support of hormones and medical treatments, you can still naturally reconfigure your body to diminish feminine characteristics. Adopting an overall healthier lifestyle should enhance your self-esteem, happiness, and drive. Avoid fixating on comparisons with others, whether you encounter them at your gym or on websites, particularly fitness publications that feature models who may be digitally altered or using illicit substances like steroids.
Stay centered on your personal journey and avoid letting external influences derail your goals.
Social Judgment and Acceptance
I used to be very concerned about others' opinions. During my transition, I often worried about how people judged me, questioning if something was wrong because I dressed and acted like a boy but still looked and sounded female. This social anxiety became overwhelming, making me withdraw whenever I left home. Anxiety can escalate into a serious issue, and seeking professional help is advisable if you're experiencing similar challenges. This article offers some tips based on my experiences that may benefit you.
One thing that significantly helped me overcome my social anxiety was realizing that people aren't watching me as closely as I imagined—they're mostly focused on themselves. This understanding allowed me to behave without feeling overly self-conscious about every action. I also repeatedly reminded myself that others' opinions of me are none of my business, which is true; just as I have my thoughts about others, they have theirs, and we all carry on with our lives. If someone treats me disrespectfully, it might bother me initially, but I typically move on from it by the end of the day; there are more important things to focus on.
Another reason I felt anxious about social judgment during my early transition stages and even now was due to self-consciousness about my appearance. I understood that people unconsciously treat and assess others differently based on their looks. Initially, I disliked almost everything about my appearance—I felt my face was uneven, perceived myself as overweight, and thought I was too short. I often dwelled on how I might have been happier with my appearance if I had been born male. However, I eventually realized that dwelling on such thoughts is entirely pointless. It's easy to fixate on the negatives in life, but it's far more beneficial to acknowledge one's own strengths and practice gratitude.
For example, my height has always been a significant insecurity for me, especially compared to cisgender men. While it remains a challenge, I've come to accept it by recognizing that I am still fortunate compared to many others who face much more severe conditions, such as blindness or deafness, which could make life significantly harder. As a transgender person, I've faced daunting and enduring challenges, many of which are permanent. However, I've been fortunate to have the opportunity to pursue my happiness through medical interventions that allowed me to change my body.
I am immensely grateful for how far I've come. There are countless things I look forward to and numerous joys awaiting me in the future, which motivates me to persevere through daily struggles. Life isn't about what you possess but rather how you choose to live it. I am determined to find as much happiness as possible in this life that I deeply appreciate having.
Other tips
Personally, I've found it beneficial to engage in hobbies or activities that genuinely interest me. However, if you're experiencing a lack of interest or excitement in anything and suspect it might be a sign of depression, I strongly encourage you to seek professional help. When I'm feeling down, I distract myself by going for a run, watching a movie, or playing video games. I know this advice may seem basic and generic, but it's simple and, more importantly, effective.
If you're not yet able to access medical assistance for your transition, there are some options available to alleviate gender dysphoria. Remember, you don't have to conform to any specific dress or behavior for others to respect your gender identity, but sometimes doing so can help align your mind with your body. Many transgender men explore "packing," which involves using a prosthetic penis or other object in their pants to create the appearance of having male anatomy. Stand-to-pee (STP) devices are also popular, enabling trans men to urinate while standing. You can find a variety of such products at ftmessentials.com/collections/all. Personally, I don't experience significant bottom dysphoria since only I am aware of it. However, for others, packing can provide significant mental relief.
Think GRIT
Discovering inner peace and contentment in life is an uphill journey, particularly for transgender individuals. However, this challenge shouldn't deter you; rather, use it as a source of motivation to propel yourself forward. Achieving a deep voice, a flat chest, and ensuring my true name appears on every document required extra effort, unlike the effortless privilege enjoyed by cisgender individuals. Yet, because I worked diligently for these accomplishments, I cherish them deeply. While contemplating future challenges can be daunting, reflecting on the resilience I've shown in overcoming past hardships strengthens my determination.